As I sit here at around midnight in the dark, I’ve been thinking about just how damaging one of my issues has been to my past, present, and future: the great difficulty that my depression-burdened mind has in keeping focus sometimes. In all ways, big and small. Daily life to long-term, and everything in between.
There are the minor ways that it happens. Like not remembering to do a certain task or not clearing your mind enough to get some work done. But then, there are the more damaging times. Especially for someone in my work fields who wants to permanently regain his successful edge so much.
One Monday early last summer, the stock market rebounded strongly from a lot of recent selling. As the following Tuesday afternoon unfolded, I should have noticed that an unusually great trading opportunity was now in front of me (as all of my past experience was screaming that things should continue well higher for the rest of the week).
As you might guess, these spots don’t come up often (if they did, it’d be way too easy to make a killing in these shark-filled financial markets). So when they happen, you have to be ready to strike quickly and decisively. But I didn’t think about it until way too late, and thus did nothing about it. There was no excuse for missing it. And yes, the market did just as I expected for those next few days (which was all I needed).
Had I taken advantage of this, it would have been a life-changer. It was one of those rare spots when not only were you dead on, but the timing and current market forces of everything aligned just right to maximize the potential of it. As close as possible to the perfect trade.
But now, all I can do is grit my teeth and hope that a similar opportunity shows up before too long (and that I’m capitalized enough to take advantage if it does). And even then, there’s obviously no guarantee it will work out as well. Or even at all. Even your best trades can only put the odds in your favor; nothing is even close to foolproof. Sometimes it just doesn’t work out, and sometimes new news will derail things. So I certainly can’t assume that I can replicate what would’ve happened last June, especially at this stage in life.
Regardless of any of that though, my focus still needs to improve about everything else in life too. From top to bottom. A better diet and more regular routines would help some, but it’s so difficult to find the energy and desire. Making yourself care enough (for lack of a better term) isn’t something that you can just conjure out of thin air.
For the first time, I think I will ask for some input here from my (few) regular readers. Have any of you dealt with these type of conundrums? Did you figure out any legit new habits that helped your mind power through depressive hazes?
Mister A's domain 